A Salad Bowl of Various Tales

Yay. I'm back from KL. I touched down yesterday at 1pm.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I always feel a warm surge of pride and joy when I arrive at Changi Airport and see that LED sign at the check-out counter that reads "Singapore Passports Only. Welcome home."

No matter how delightful my overseas trip was, I would still be so happy to be home.

I looked immensely forward to coming home and kissing Joshie's cheeks till it becomes raw. I missed that bugger so much!

I was also looking forward to the familiar scent and feel of my bed, and can't wait to sleep off the rest of the afternoon. But things will never go according to plan. I was called back to office for an urgent briefing for my coming Hong Kong trip.

Heck. So I towed my luggage and a pounding headache straight to office. I ended up working till 8pm.

While I'm not going to bitch vehemently about KL like how Xiaxue did, I do have a few complaints about Malaysia Airline and the standard of service from Malaysian service staff.

I have decided that this would be the last time I will ever take a Malaysia Airline flight - if I have a choice. The stewards were plump and pimply. The stewardesses were dreamy and slouchy. And the pilot flew like he's in a race.

Bloody hell. The plane took such a violent landing and skid roughly to a stop, I had actually anticipated the plane to flip on its sides.

And if Singaporean complain so much about how rude our service staff are, they ought to go KL and experience worse service. Our service staff may be rude, but at least they aren't fuckin' lazy or plain liars.

I asked a waitress during the conference luncheon for a clean napkin. She walked to a collection point for used cutlery and whatsnot, and just picked out a napkin from a pile of used ones. When she handed it to me, I asked her, "You sure this is clean?" And she replied, "Yes, clean!"

Bloody hell. There were more lipstick marks and stains on the napkins than on Hugh Hefner's shirt.

Stoopid woman. I should have made her clean her face with the napkin she gave me.

On another occasion, this waiter stood at the glass door, looking at me as I approached with my hands filled. There was no way I could push open the heavy glass doors.

So I smiled at him and nodded towards the door. I waited, thinking he'd get what my super-duper expressive eyes were saying. We ended up looking at each other for the longest time.

So I gave up and asked him to help. He ignored me at first, then stared at the door after I repeated my request. Maybe the poor chap has a phobia of opening doors. Or he just doesn't comprehend what I'm saying. But how confusing can "Please open the door for me" be? Which part of it does he not understand?

KL is the capital state for Malaysia, where international businesses converge. Wouldn't the hospitality staff be of a higher standard? All the hospitality staff I encountered in Bangkok had no trouble conversing with me in English!

Utterly shitty.

Oh and there was this fella who kept staring at me while I was waiting for the KLIA Express train at KL Sentral Station with Tess. Tess and I were talking and every time Tess' head obstructed his view, he'd shift and continue looking at me.

Sheesh. For a moment I thought I had left my hotel room stark naked to warrant such attention from the odd fella.

To make things worse, I freaked out at the number of articles on rape crimes in their newspapers. Girls were being sodomised left, right and centre by highly deprived men. Why does Malaysian criminals enjoy sodomy so much?

And since Tess had to fly back to Singapore ahead of me on Tuesday night, I kept worrying about being poked in the back while I slept. Every creak and jiggle of the door knob unnerved me and I would leap out of bed to check that the door was indeed latched. So I spent the whole night huddled under the sheets in the hotel room with all the lights on and a cork up my ass.

Right. I was kidding about the cork up my ass.

Simply awful.

Anyway, I'll do the photos tonight and write about my KL trip over the weekend. Then it is off to Hong Kong for a week next Monday.

Sigh... I'll miss my baby so darned much!