Urgh. How does one train when the stars of Thai boxing were in one's line of sight. And OH, Naruepol is simply smouldering. And because he would not smile and appear so aloof all the time, he was all the more smouldering. There is a fine reason why he is nicknamed Mr GQ. *slurps*
And Yodsaenklai was a monster in the ring. He was mesmerising to watch. The sounds of his kicks radiated throughout the training grounds, and he could kick continuously without stumbling. His legs were like machines. And you know how I love 'em rough and tough.
Oh such distractions. How to train like that you tell me?!
At one point, Josh had to tell me to stop grining away whenever Naruepol walked past me cos I looked so ridiculous. Urgh.
So for the next few days, I had to maintain my cool-ness and pretended not to notice Naruepol during training.
My trainer was also quite a looker. And I swear he was trying to flirt with me cos he would keep trying to trip me during training and then catch me in his arms. Seriously, someone should teach the boy that is NOT the way to flirt with a lady.
On the second night in Pattaya, I received a basket of flowers from a hotelier who discovered that I was in town. He invited Josh and me to dinner at his hotel that evening, and we went.
Mid-way through dinner, dear old Uncle Hans turned up, joined us for dinner, then whisked us off to Walking Street for a quick tour of the flesh trade. We had a drink each at a carousel bar - those that twirl round and round and round until you are so dizzy you start to find that wrinkled middle-aged Thai prostitute good-looking enough to take home; at a topless bar where four bored-looking girls in thongs shook their booty and a harem of unsmiling topless girls sit near the stage buffing their nails or fondling each other's nipples; and at an al fresco cafe of a gay hotel in Boyz Town.
Apart from attraction of sex workers that walk down Walking Street tugging at and teasing farangs who are game for a night of paid sex, we also marveled over a stall that sold fried bugs as snacks.
I will put many dirty things (at least dirty by my mom's standards.. heheh) in my mouth, but I sure as hell would not let these bugs go anywhere near my lips.
On our last night in slutsville by the sea (as Uncle Hans calls Pattaya) we headed back to Walking Street cos seriously, what else can you do at night in Pattaya?
We went to a bar where the girls - real girls and ladyboys - were decked out in skimpy, patent nurse uniforms. A pretty one sat with Joshua, trying to chat him up. A few topless girls frolicking in a jacuzzi tub beckoned him to join them.
And what did Josh do? He sat there so reserved and I had to egg him on to go indulge himself a little. I even suggested he pick up a pretty one for a threesome. :D
OK, I know you must be thinking I am mad to encourage my husband to play. But really, there wasn't a single ounce of jealousy in my veins. Perhaps I was dying to find out if he could get his one-eyed monster up with another girl since he has been too tired to screw me for the past few months. You never know - experiencing a threesome could remind him of the pleasures of the flesh and rekindle his lust.
Anyway, as the night wore on, I made friends with a couple of ladyboys and we sat in a corner discussing plastic surgery, boob sizes and stingy Indian customers who like to fondle for free. The ladyboys were fascinated with my skin and boobs, and just imagine this - they sat there stroking my arms and prodding my boobs. How kinky.
After three days in Pattaya, we headed to the lovely island of Koh Samet, where we spent three splendid days basking in the sun...
gobbling fine foods...
slurping sweet Caipiroskas...
taking in enchanting sunsets...
and of course, enjoying the pure serenity of Le Virman Cottages.
Ahh, the good life, people. The good life.
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